This time last year I was leaning into the idea that “small is all” (thank you adrienne maree brown), and focusing on the world immediately in front of me. I spent last winter cocooned with my people, battling hard through some dark times and pulling myself ahead bit by bit by focusing on small miracles.
What a difference a year can make, and how grateful I am for those small moments of grace that built up incrementally and carried us up out of the darkness.
Just this past week, I have felt my insides open like a flower in bloom. I have been working on several different creative projects and getting jolts of joy from them all. I find myself obsessed in the best way, working for hours without noticing the time as it passes.
This week I have been moved to tears by an essay, and moved to tears again by a song. The hard shell I built around myself is cracking open; it served its purpose but I am relieved and thrilled to feel it falling away.
Yesterday I got back in front of a children’s choir for the first time in a year. Holy shit, that was fun. I didn’t know just how much I missed it until I was there, loving the crap out of every second. I bounced out of that room with a giddy smile on my face. Right. I belong there. Not because I am so great at it or anything like that, but because it lights my soul on fire.
So I guess small is still all, because each of these little miracles is accumulating to a life full of colour and joy and music and energy. Little by little, I am re-entering all the parts of my life I had put on hold. It took this long to be able to do it, and now it’s like a tidal wave pouring out of me.
I am back, baby. Not the same as I was, always and forever changed, always and forever changing, but feeling like I can find and recognize all the parts of myself again.
Nothing is on hold, nothing is hidden.
And I’m damn excited about what this tidal wave is bringing.
xo
Shannon
Upcoming Shows
Hibernate: Under Covers
Friday, February 13 at 7pm
Port Hope United Church
My band, Plainville United, is one of many Friends of Cultivate performing our favourite Canadian songs to open the Hibernate festival (the winter edition of my beloved Cultivate). I’ve seen the full lineup and it’s looking sweeeeet.
Grab your tickets.
SAVE THE DATE - May 9
I’ve hinted at, or maybe even talked outright about (?) several new projects on the horizon. On May 9th two of them will take the stage at the Old Camborne Schoolhouse. I’ll share all the details very soon, but for now put this date in your calendar!
Featured Song - Bonny Light Horseman (Plainville United)